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Does age matter in relationship

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Debate Argument does age matter in relationship

Age does matter in relationships because if your young and dating someone a couple years older then what you are. Maturity is a big factor in serious relationships.
If your a girl and dating someone older the guy could take advantage of you or abusive you just because you are younger.
An advantage to having someone older than you is that they know more and have knowledge and experience in love and know what it’s like to be hurt or left. They are mature enough to know about having a commitment and are serious in aspects that really matter in relationships. In the other hand, In the society today, there are many couples who have a big age gap between them. There are men who have younger wives and women who have younger husbands. For men predominantly, they find younger age in the opposite sex as somewhat attractive. For most young women who seek older men, it is quite common that they’re looking for maturity and confidence as well. Oftentimes, they seek someone who is older because they would want someone who can understand them better and perhaps guide them as well since older men have more experience in life.

I believe that you should be close and age and if your younger then 18 you shouldn't be dating someone that ins't in your high school.
I would like to take this first round to clear which side I'm on and to dispute some of my opponent's arguments, as follows:
1. I agree that maturity is a serious factor in relationships, but would like to point out that it is not nessacarily determind by age.
Levels of Maturity - Immature individuals tend to be funnier and more exciting to be around, but when it comes to the important things - sometimes you can be left disappointed. Sometimes, different levels of maturity can be the deciding factor between your relationship making it or breaking under the pressure.

For example, a fifty-year-old and a twenty-year-old could be in a relationship and at the same maturity level.
2. If you're in a relationship with a guy or girl that takes advantage of you or abuses you, it makes no difference what you're situation is, they'll do that no matter what, and that's not a good person to be in a relationship with anyway.
In conclusion, the choices you make in your life are solely yours. Age shouldn’t really matter for as long as they both are mature; in addition they had to have the same goals in their lives and care about each other. Always have a positive attitude in your relationship and try to be as understanding as you can be. However, a relationship is like a boat in the ocean and I they can’t work together they cannot land the boat. Moreover, the thing that matters the most in a relationship is the love between couples. You can be in a relationships with a person that takes advantage of you of abuses you; it makes no difference what you age is, they will do that no matter what the age is. Eventually, “Age is an issue of mind over matter, if you don’t mind it doesn’t matter” -Mark Twain.



Besides, the only thing that should matter in a relationship is love, and if they truly love each other, nothing else should matter.
I agree with your argument that love should matter in the relationship but if you are dating someone much older then you they can have a lot of emotional baggage.
Age shouldn’t determine whether or not two people are allowed to love each other and be with one another. Maturity is a big deal when it comes to age. Although that may stop people from loving each other, people learn from their mistakes and will eventually be mature enough. It shouldn’t matter because when you’re with someone you love; you will learn with them and will have experience on how you should act and behave, etc….In the article “Does Age Matter in Relationships” by J Francis, he says “Many may argue that with age comes maturity.

A lot of problems or emotional baggage that can drag you down. The verbally abuse of their actions, if they are younger the older person most likely won't want to listen to what they have to say or take advice from someone who is younger then them.
It is entirely your choice whether you decide to date someone considerably older or younger than yourself. To some age isn’t a significant factor in dating, while others have a strong opinion and will only date people the same age or within a few years of their age. It is a personal choice. There are no rules to say you shouldn’t date someone much older or younger than yourself, but be prepared for possible judgment from others if there is a considerable age gap.



The maturity of the the two people is definitely a main part. If there is a huge dating and their sexual active. Age matters and vary is relationships. If the girls to young people may take that as the guy she wants to have sex with her and she will get a hard time about it. The girl might be to young to be able to handle it all, and it could lead to many difficult times in the relationships.
If one has to offer advice to a person considering a long-term commitment to an older or younger partner, some reflection on the future should feature prominently. While a 45 year old, young-at-heart man might appeal to a 20 year old woman right now, he might not be so attractive in 20 years time when he is retired and lacks energy. Whatever opinions might be, couples with large age discrepancies will continue to make choices based on what works for them, taking into consideration levels of commitment, maturity and, of course, love. Age should be considered like any other compatibility factor in relationships. The age old adage, “love is blind” might still hold value for some.

I don't believe just because you like someone that much and they are that much older then you that it will work. It's harder if there is such a huge age difference.
Emotional Baggage-Painful memories, mistrust and hurt carried around from past sexual or emotional rejection.
Age matters in relationships in two different contexts. First, it matters because relationship involves understanding. Understanding requires great deal of wisdom and maturity; understanding is considered a gift of maturity which can be achieved by going through long years of life experiences (Nooshin, 2009). When partners are mature enough to understand the complexities of life it is easier for them to keep the relationship intact, no matter what challenges they face. This is because the mature partner basically knows his/her way around in almost every situation. On the other hand, age matters in a relationship because of social perception. There are instances when age gap is an issue when it comes to relationships; generally people are not used to seeing a couple that looks like a granddaughter and grandfather kissing in the park. However, regardless of age, relationship is essentially the result of a mutual understanding. It involves the most universal feeling that is love. Age gap in a relationship is not a matter of morality, but rather a justification of one of the characteristics of love and that is “love transcends all boundaries” (Greaves, 2011) regardless of age, race and gender. Therefore, age does not matter in a relationship.



1. "A lot of problems or emotional baggage that can drag you down."- Anyone can have emotional baggage, it's not just older people. A younger person can be at a higher emotional level than the older person (like I said before), and have more emotional baggage.
According to the recent studies on life expectancy, women tend to benefit less from marriage irrespective of whether her spouse is younger or older than her (Science Daily). Sven Drefahl of the Max Planck Institute for Demographic Research in Germany, concludes that it is socially and psychologically most beneficial for a woman to marry a man of exactly the same age as herself. The reverse is true for men - the younger the wife, the longer the husband will live.


2. "If they are younger the older person most likely won't want to listen to what they have to say or take advice from someone who is younger then them."- That "dominant partner" struggle is present in any relationship-whether the partner is smarter, more mature, or older, there's one in every relationship. They just have to overcome it.
3. The second of my opponent's paragraphs I had already explained in the first round. (See maturity)

Arguments:
1. The bottom line is, every relationship has things to overcome, but if they can overcome them, it only makes the relationship stronger.
Despite such scientific studies, men and women have consistently chosen younger or older partners for centuries and have enjoyed fulfilled relationships. It has often been the norm in many societies for older men to prefer younger women as their life partners, and it is now increasingly common for women to marry younger men. Some embrace this behaviour as an off-shoot of the Women’s Liberation Movement and women expressing their new-found freedom of choice. Others in favour of patriarchy continue to condemn these women and men for going against societal norms.



2. And believe it or not, relationships with age gaps are very common these days. The way you were raised just determines if you accept it or not.
"There is no such thing as young or old, only younger and older. You will always have someone younger than you and you will always have someone older than you.
But when there is a large age gap, this is when a relationship can face difficulties. With an age gap there is always going to be lifestyle differences. A younger person may enjoy nights out with their younger friends and have no interest in starting a serious relationship, whereas, their older partner might be at an age where they want to settle down and spend quiet time alone with them.

"
The younger lover can be immature. Sometimes, young lovers are such perfectionists that they seek all sorts of things that you can't give. This is why, if you want to go out with someone younger, make sure that he or she is mature for his or her age.
But sometimes, there are people who are far more mature than their age. That is why although they have partners who are either way older or younger than them, they're still able to adjust to any situation their relationship might be in.

The life experience is definately a big part of the relationship. Usually by mid to late 20's you have basically seen most everything in your life a time or two. 18 year olds, for their own sake, I hope have not seen most of that.

Arguments:
1. There will always be someone older or younger but it's usually not over anywhere between 3-5 years difference.
I beg to differ. Maturity is taught by life’s experiences. Many men and women learn from events in their lives. Events from their childhood may shape their outlook on marriage and relationships. They carry the lessons from these experiences into their adult years.” People learn about maturity from their experiences in life and they learn from their childhood life and will have an effect on their marriage and relationships with older people. The lessons learned from those experiences will bring them to become adults and learn from their mistakes and experiences. (J Francis)



The most important factor to understand is that although our bodies will show our age to a certain degree, age is most significant when it relates to maturity. Whether you find yourself to be the younger or the older person in a relationship, take into account whether your maturity levels match.
But sometimes, there are people who are far more mature than their age. The main are where problems might exist though would be when it comes to handling the family’s finances. If one of the couple is earning more than the other, conflicts may arise. But as in any relationships, conflicts are to be expected. And these issues can be quickly resolved through open communication. Of course, you cannot avoid family and friends who might not be supportive in your relationship. But do not let this discourage you. If this happens, you should take it as a challenge to work harder in your relationship to prove to them that you can handle it and that you love the person you’re with regardless of their age. If you make age an issue, this will surely affect your relationship. But if you accept your partner whole heartily, then you should be able to adjust pretty well in your relationship and make it work for both of you.

You may find in life that a fifty year old and a thirty year old can be very similar in regard to their maturity level. This all depends on their life experiences, personal outlooks and goals.
Match.com has found that relationships actually work best when the male is older.

And, tests at Georgia Health Services University show that "overall studies show there isn't much difference between couples in age-discrepant relationships and those who aren't," according to Dr. Mirsad Serdarevic.

I can't stress enough that age makes little or no difference on the relationship.
Their is a cliche that says "Age doesn't matter in love". There are a lot of people who believe in this saying. In fact, most of them have gotten married and have surpassed difficult challenges in their married life. However, there are still people who don't believe in that saying. But the so-called May-December affair is relatively common in society right now and people have slowly learned to accept it.

The only problem that it might have are people frowning upon their age difference, but true love overcomes it, as it does in all relationships.
I agree completely that in a relationship the male should be older, it usually works better but I don't think if the male is that much older that it would work out so well.
Despite these potential problem areas, many relationships with an age gap are highly successful. The key is honesty and communication. Being open and truthful from the start about what you are looking for in a relationship, and even life, is the best way to ensure you are able to achieve this. If both partners are in agreement, then there is no issue. Like with any relationship, if you are happy, have a strong bond and are committed to making it work, then together you can cope with any complication life throws in your direction.



Despite our fascination with them, then, big age gaps aren't common. Whether or not they work depends on normal relationships rules. Kutcher once said, "The real trick is putting yourself around people you admire.

link: http://www.guardian.co.uk...
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Con

Points on which my opponent and I have agreed on:
1. Love matters in relationships.
2. That relationships work best when the male is older.

Rebuttals:
"Despite our fascination with them, then, big age gaps aren't common. Whether or not they work depends on normal relationships rules.
For some relationship experts, a relationship with a big age gap will still work depending on the situation. It also depends on the outlook in life of the people involved, as well as how people handle their relationship. Regardless of age, it is actually and individual's disposition that will determine the outcome of his relationship with another person.

"
Statistics show that there are exactly 858,000 married couples in the U.S. where the husband is 15-19 years older than his wife.
Statistics show that there are exactly 161,000 married couples in the U.S. where the wife is 15-19 years older than her husband.
We both agree on: love matters in a relationship and that relationships are better when the male is older.
When people fall in love, they don't necessarily take age into consideration. What usually matters for them is how they feel for that person. This is a fact which is dominant when it comes to males. Besides, asking a person you're dating upfront about their age is considered to be rude.



In the United States, men are usually are older than women at first marriage. For 44% of the births occurring in 1988, for example, the father was three or more years older than the mother. Sixty percent of mothers aged 15-17 and 51% of those aged 18-19 reported that the father of their child was at least three years older than they were.

I agree that there can be at least two or three years different but I just don't agree to be anywhere between five to ten years age difference.

*When adolescents younger than 18 are involved with men who are substantially older than they are, differences between partners in such factors as maturity, life experience, social position, financial resources and physical size may make such relationships inherently unequal, and the young women may therefore be vulnerable to abuse and exploitation by their partners.
My opponent has re-stated a lot of their arguments, so I will re-state my rebuttals:

1. I agree that maturity is a serious factor in relationships, but would like to point out that it is not nessacarily determind by age. For example, a fifty-year-old and a twenty-year-old could be in a relationship and at the same maturity level.
2. If you're in a relationship with a guy or girl that takes advantage of you or abuses you, it makes no difference what you're situation is, they'll do that no matter what, and that's not a good person to be in a relationship with anyway.
However, if one person involved lies about what they want from the relationship then this can cause big problems further down the line. If you want a serious relationship, but the person you are dating only wants a casual one, then you need to think long and hard about whether they are worth sacrificing your dreams for.


3. Anyone can have emotional baggage, it's not just older people. A younger person can be at a higher emotional level than the older person, and have more emotional baggage.
4. That "dominant partner" struggle is present in any relationship-whether the partner is smarter, more mature, or older, there's one in every relationship. They just have to overcome it.
5. Relationships with age gaps are very common these days. The way you were raised just determines if you accept it or not.
6. Love is the only factor that should really matter in relationships.

So, in conclusion, age does not matter in relationships. The only determining factor is love and happiness. And for us to say it is wrong for a 45-year-old to be married to a 23-year-old is wrong. It is not our place for us to judge them just as it is not our place to judge two married people that are different races.

Also, please note that my opponent said this: "Whether or not they work depends on normal relationships rules. Kutcher once said, The real trick is putting yourself around people you admire."-My opponent is saying here that age-gap-relationships can work, depending on who you put yourself around, people who will not accept it or those people who really love you that will accept and support what you do no matter what.

Finally to close this debate: "In fact their age gap may actually make them more evenly matched," as said by the Christian dating guide. I wish my opponent the best..
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